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I read two articles from my Yahoo! homepage this morning. The first was about Willow Smith (Will and Jada Pinkett Smith's progeny) and it was titled "Willow Smith says she's polyamorous. Here's why the 20-year-old's admission is so important." The opening line was, "Willow Smith is polyamorous and proud." The article went on to extol the benefits of polyamorous relationships (for the uninitiated, "polyamorous" is the new and preferred term for "free love," which, itself, was a euphemism back in the day for "adultery"). Adultery... what a quaint concept. As the standards of "abstinence" and "restraint" have fallen out of fashion, where is there room for adultery? If you erase the boundaries, what's the point of rules?
"CBS News reports that in 2019, about 5 percent of U.S. residents are in consensual or ethical non-monogamy relationships, an umbrella term that includes all arrangements besides monogamy, including polyamory. Additionally, according to a 2016 study in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, about 20 percent of single U.S. adults reported that they have engaged in consensual non-monogamy at some point in their life."
Quaint indeed. Note the moral equivalence of "consensual" and "ethical." A nice little verbal sleight of hand. But then, revolutions aren't televised. They happen in almost immeasurable increments, and by the time you've wizened up to what's happened, it's all around you, the new normal, the accepted brand, the way it's done.
The second article, conveniently situated at the bottom of the first one, was titled "The rise of polyamorous parenting: Why 'throuple' families are coming out." This little piece of provocation masking as news opens with this:
"Ian Jenkins, Alan Mayfield and Jeremy Hodges are three men in love, in a committed, long-term "throuple." They are also fathers of two, through surrogacy, and are the trio behind a much-heralded legal fight in California, which won all three men the right to be listed on the birth certificate of their first baby, Piper, who is now 3. Now their landmark court victory and parenting journey, which includes the addition of Parker, 1, is the subject of a new memoir by Jenkins, Three Dads and a Baby, out this month."
"Throuple." Add that to Webster's list of newly minted words for the 21st century. And add it to what you'll be getting used to in your very near future:
"And while their story is certainly unique, it seems to be part of a growing trend: Throuples not only becoming parents together but proudly sharing their lives with the world. It's due in part, of course, to social media, but also what appears to be a cultural shift: In addition to the birth certificate victory in California, the city of Somerville, Mass., recently extended domestic partner benefits to include polyamorous groups of three or more. Seeming baby steps are huge to those affected."
Baby steps. Immeasurable increments. That wiley old demon Screwtape put it best, "Indeed the safest road to Hell is the gradual one -- the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts... “ (C.S. Lewis's The Screwtape Letters).
Pay attention, people, if you want to save your soul. We've been fed off capitalism at such a constant pace for so long, like 24/7 news cycles and ever-present social media, that we can no longer distinguish between healthy desire and abject greed, between true contentment and clinical anesthesia, between new ideas and ubiquitous distraction. We've mistaken wanting more with living better. Trouble is, more is never enough. It's always more, more, more... to the point where we starve ourselves on excess. We die from having, eating, buying too much. And it all starts to innocuously, doesn't it? With that new outfit, that new tool. "New" is the new morality.
The other trouble is, what we end up desiring is less than what God intends to give us, what he desires for us. But that kind of divine desire doesn't announce itself with provocative videos, blaring headlines, or juicy kiss-and-tell tid-bits. The good is outgunned in any short-term skirmish by evil and all its wiles. That's always been its chief disadvantage. Good has never been the low-hanging fruit (just ask Eve).
Here's the competition, the newest video, just released by K/DA and featuring Madison Beer, (G)I-DLE, Lexie Liu, Jaira Burns, Seraphine. It's called "More":
I'm givin' you more 'cause I'm greater than 필요 없는 시험들, 답은 이미 But all of my numbers are talkin', babe 블루마블 Mrs. 모노폴리 (oh-ooh) 너는 – 종이 돈이 나는 real money (hey) 필요 없대 너네들이 많은 돈들 Go get it, go get it, go get it, the mission 눈을 못 떼 모두 그래 너도 그래 (oh-oh-ooh) 'Cause I got it different
All I'll ever know is life upon a throne 시작하면 끝을 보는 거야 You want
More Know I got it, so here you go (let's go) You look like you could use some more (more) Know I got it and never runnin' low (low) Yeah, I got more than enough, add it up and away (ayy, ayy) You know I got it like bomb-bomb, blow your mind Never givin' less and that's how it'll stay (ayy, ayy) You know I got it like all day, all the time
When I go, it's for gold Yeah, they cool, but I'm cold I don't fit in the mold I'm a rebel I don't do what you say Makin' moves, I don't wait While I smile in your face I got different DNA
What's higher than the top? That's me (that's me) Come take a look before falling at my feet (ooh-oh-oh) 조용히 몸을 숙, 여 봐 (yeah, yeah, yeah) So take a look, 나를 기억해 a queen (ooh-oh-oh-ooh) All I'll ever know is life up on a throne
The opening lines of T.S. Eliot's "The Love Song of J. Alfred Proofrock's" prophesied this moment:
Let us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherized upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question ...
Oh, do not ask, “What is it?”
Let us go and make our visit.
Oh do not ask "What is it?" Let us go and make our visit.
Turns out, we left our souls at the door of modern culture decades ago, and since it had been starved for so long for the last 500 years, we hardly noticed its absence. What you don't feel can't hurt you, right? If you don't know you had it in the first place, you can't really lose it, can you?
And then there's this song/video, also newly released from K/DA, called "Villain." Props to her at least for coming out of the closet:
On the low, only love myself, no more Take you to the grave, I'll ghost I know I can be so cold In the dark, where I like to keep my heart Know I'm all bite, no bark Like to catch you way off guard
I'll stay so deep inside your brain And take you somewhere far away
Time to roll the dice, you know I'm the type Type to risk my life, not afraid to die Type to make you cry, type to put a price All up on your head, do just what I said
I'm a straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin' Straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin'
I'm alive, but I'm dead Hear my voice up in your head Watch it fill you full of dread 'til you go
Is it really a surprise if I'm playing with your mind? And I treat you like a prize then I throw you to the side? Am I really that bad if I love to make you mad? And get happy when you're sad? Only care about a bag
In control That's how I like it and I'm never letting go, na-ah-ah Never had a soul (soul) So you ain't taking nothing from me when you go, na-ah-ah
I'll stay so deep inside your brain And take you somewhere far away
Time to roll the dice, you know I'm the type Type to risk my life, not afraid to die Type to make you cry, type to put a price All up on your head, do just what I said
I'm a straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin' (yeah-yeah) Straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin' (woo)
I'm alive, but I'm dead Hear my voice up in your head Watch it fill you full of dread' til you go (a-ah, pow)
Bang, bang, you can do anything No fear, no pain, listen to your brain, go Go stupid, go dumb, go stupid, and... And then we go insane, whoa Just do what I say Follow me, I'll lead the way
Time to roll the dice, you know I'm the type Type to risk my life, not afraid to die Type to make you cry, type to put a price All up on your head, do just what I said
I'm a straight up villain, straight up villain Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin' Straight up villain, straight up villain (yeah) Yeah, no feelin', yeah, no feelin' (woo)
I'm alive, but I'm dead Hear my voice up in your head Watch it fill you full of dread 'til you go (ah, pow)
Pow is right. Boom. Done. Flat-line.
Like to catch you way off guard
I'll stay so deep inside your brain And take you somewhere far away
Do you need a neon sign to see the truth, people? Cuz if you ain't seeing, you ain't looking.